Until a person can learn to lead his or her self effectively, they will never be able to lead others effectively.
What direction do you consider when you think about leadership?
Most of the time when people talk about leadership, they talk about it from a north-to-south position. In other words, they speak about it from a standpoint of leading those under them.
But, all true and effective leadership begins first on the inside. Until a person can learn to lead his or her self effectively, they will never be able to lead others effectively.
My own personal experience has proven this to be true. My hardest leadership challenge has always been myself and here’s why: because everyone in this world, including me, has blind spots.
What is a blind spot? It’s those areas in our lives where we consistently fail to see ourselves accurately and our situations realistically.
Again, everybody has them, but few recognize them. There is something inside all of us that allows us to see everyone else’s issues far more clearly than our own, and it often gives us a false impression of who we are or what we do.
We always give ourselves the benefit of the doubt because we put things in context of our intentions, but when we judge others, we only view them on the basis of their actions.
Now, blind spots are vast and can be very diverse, but there are four common blind spots that are most destructive to leaders:
- Thinking Their Way is The Only Way: I have always been a strong, opinionated person, and while in and of itself it’s not a bad quality, when taken to the extreme, it can lead me to the false belief that I am always right. As a younger leader, I often tried to force people to see things my way, so I would miss out on incredible and intelligent input from others who had something valuable to contribute.I once read about a world champion chess player who, when he was losing, would often get up and stand behind his opponent and evaluate the board from his side. Just that change of position and seeing the board from his opponent’s viewpoint allowed him to discover shortsighted moves he had made and adjust successfully. We would all do well to put this move into our lives as well, no matter how right we may think we are.
- Insecurity: Insecure leaders are more worried about how they are perceived by others than the actual good of the team or the organization. They always take more than they give. They limit their best people. It’s hard for them to see others advance and rise because they see it as a direct threat to their own position and influence. Somehow giving others their due credit makes them feel like less themselves. Jealousy is the twin brother of insecurity and is cancer to a leader’s influence.
- Out-of-Control Ego: Prideful, egotistical leaders really believe they know it all. They honestly believe others to be inferior to them. They are rigid, brash and closed-minded. There are some telltale signs of prideful leaders: They don’t believe anyone else can do as good a job as they can. They are always quick to cast blame on others when things go wrong. They dismiss anyone else’s opinion quickly. They put others down continuously.
- Weak Character: No amount of talent can compensate for a lack of integrity. Leaders who are shifty and shady never have the trust of their people, and trust is the ultimate currency of leadership. Character is the sum total of our everyday choices. It’s putting the right values into action every single day. It’s demonstrating a consistency and predictability in our words, actions, values and ideals.
What can we do to make sure we are truly leading ourselves first every day?
- Check Your Passion Level Daily: Passionless people inspire no one. Now, I’m not saying we have to always walk around with some crazy grin on our face all the time, but don’t let indifference set up shop in your heart, either. Miserable people make people miserable. Find some spark and talk yourself out of a negative attitude and into a positive, passionate one! Get a vision for your life. Big vision brings big passion. People who lack passion don’t really have a passion problem; they have a vision problem. A vision is rooted in purpose, and when we feel as though we are working toward a purpose, that purpose brings with it a passion for life and our work. Even if what you’re doing right now isn’t where you eventually want to be, it’s still a big part of the process, so celebrate that! Passion is bounding out of bed in the morning believing that something is out there today worth working at and striving for.
- Learn to Love People More Than Positions: Possessions or Promotions Cultivate and develop a deep love for people. Many people don’t look at other people as highly valuable. Most of the time, when they meet someone, without even thinking about it, they subconsciously put a two or three on their head as value and then wait to see if they will earn a higher value through their actions. If you really want to be a better leader and develop a deeper love for people, reverse that. Put a 10 on top of every person you meet and start by giving them the benefit of the doubt right up front. Assume the best about people, not the worst. Believe that they are highly valuable, have incredible potential, and have something positive and beneficial to offer. Of course, not everyone will live up to that, and from time to time, we will be disappointed. However, by starting there with everyone we meet, it allows us to discover hidden talent that other people have overlooked and it will also help you become a transformational leader to many.
- Make It Your Goal to Serve Someone, Somewhere, Everyday: I have met many different leaders from different parts of the world and from many different fields. I’ve noticed that people want to lead for many different reasons. Some just want power. Some just want wealth. Some want honor and respect. Of course, some really do want to make a difference and change the world. But, at its core, I believe the only worthy motivation for leadership is a desire to serve others. In his book “The Other Side of Leadership,” author Eugene Habecker wrote this, “The true leader marks his accomplishment by service. Serving people and their best interests is his highest goal. True leaders experience their greatest joy not in moments of personal glory or recognition, but in seeing those that they have served do well.”
- Integrity and Accountability Should Be Your Compass: I see too many leaders lead like bad parents. They do whatever they want but tell the people they are supposed to be leading, “Do as I say, not as I do.” That doesn’t work in leadership or parenting. What you permit in your own life is ultimately what you promote in those you influence and lead. Undisciplined leaders lead undisciplined teams. Leaders who take shortcuts lead teams that look for shortcuts. Leaders who do the minimum lead teams who produce the minimum. Leadership is about focusing more on our responsibilities than our rights. We must raise the standard. Our lives are what set the bar. I can never effectively keep others accountable in areas where I do not first hold myself accountable. We must hold ourselves to high standards. Ultimately, our influence will rise or fall on this single act more than anything else.
It starts with me. Lead yourself well, and leading others gets a whole lot easier.
J. Mark Johns is the founder and president of Vital Vision International, a leadership development group with clients representing many facets of the business community. He is also lead pastor at Christ Central in Alachua.